For those of you who hadn’t noticed, I was extremely excited about the Shiny Stories contest in the Rift forums. I worked really hard over several weeks, fine-tuning my rough draft, double-checking spelling and artifact names, and on the second to last day, I was finally satisfied. Here is my entry:
[A Madman and his Mutants]
A [Crossed Out Enemies List] fluttered from the [Marvelous Ramparts], where [Morban Wildvine] drank from his [Thermos of Still Piping Hot Magma]. [No Survivors] had escaped his [Sneak Infantry Attacks]. The [Squirming Maggots]—with their [Sickly Eyes and Yellow Teeth]—deserved [Extreme Punishments]. And he, [Beast of the Penultipocalypse], who [Crushed Dreams] with his [Effective Spy Network] and [Baleful Laser Stare]! With [Happy Thoughts, Happy Thoughts], he watched [General Orkanbinger] teach [The Blightweald Maneuver] to an [Endless Supply] of [Indefatigable Soldiers].
Arriving from [The Great Hunt], [Darn the Undevoured Parasitic Twin] [Distracted Attention] with [Ascended Clones Gone Wrong]. “[The Wounded Are Easier to Catch], master, [More Minds to Enslave]!”
With their [Catch of the Day], they took [Zhaknar’s Portal to the Briny Deep], [The Unhappiest Place in Telara]. There, [Appropriately Themed Torches] flickered in the [Dank Dampness] while Darn [Beat an Ascended] with [Obviously Evil Machinist Tools]. Wiping his [Sweaty Brow] with [Regulos Sackcloth Napkins], Darn said, “[Bringing About the End of the World] is hard!”
After [Another Goblet] of [Ludicrously Strong Liquor], Morban [Punctured Eyeballs] with his [Disgustingly Long Fingernail], spraying [Something Indescribably Nasty] on his [Fancy Silk Pants]. [Almost Feeling Compassion], he planted a [Well Executed Pincer Movement] into a [Tormented Soul] with [Overwhelming Forcefulness], leaving a [Gaping Chest Wound]. [Snap…. and Crack], he pried an [Overly Ornate Ring] off the [Dead Man’s Fingers].
“[Revenge is Sweet],” Morban sneered, “now for [Corpse Disposal].”
There are exactly 50 different artifact names in my story, and 75 “normal” words, not including the title.
I really, really, really had fun with this contest, and have the beginnings of a new chapter in “Morban Wildvine”‘s life already started in my writing workbook. So, thanks a lot to Seshatar and Brasse for the shiny stories competition, as well as to Trion for the prize options!
The winners were announced tonight on Trion’s Twitch Live stream, which unfortunately kept getting me parsing errors on my tablet. Boo. I ended up watching the re-run a bit later from my computer, and wriggled with joy at 28:47 when Brasse said: “Okay, this is actually one of my favorites.” It was mine! In third place! Woohoo! ❤
You can read all the entries, as well as the rules, in this forum thread. Congrats to all the winners, but also to everyone who participated. It’s not always easy to put yourself out there, but it’s as important as winning.
P.S. Way to go Trion peeps for promoting literacy in a fun and subtle way!